Average

I feel like I’ve done everything “right” in life…and yet here I am, at 25, in my parent’s basement.

I’ll keep my first blog relatively short. Every point I wanted to make when I tried writing this the first time deserved its own chapter in a novel – middle school, high school, college, when I realized I was gay, dreams and goals I’ve had, whats happened along the way… there was no direction. In all honesty I’m not quite sure why exactly I’m writing this. I’m not one to read or write all that much but for some reason while I was sitting around this particular evening, the thought of writing a blog sounded therapeutic, so here I am.

Just know that by doing everything “right”, thats to say I was ambitious in high school, listened to all the advice that was given to me through my college years, and now I work full time as a public middle school teacher. Despite what sounds like your average, semi-successful 25-year-old, I still cannot afford a place of my own and the more life goes by, the more I feel like a total failure. Perhaps I just nailed it there – “average”. There isn’t necessarily anything that sets me apart.

I come from an average family, earned average grades through school, have average looks (the look where people stop me everywhere to ask where they know me from, or to ask if I can help them out in whatever store I find myself in because apparently I work at Lowes, J. Crew, Flower shops, GAP). Once upon a time I had quite a few goals and dreams that were not so average – but as the saying goes life got in the way. As well as I did and have done compared to peers, I continue to beat myself up.

As I continue to type this out, I find myself veering off topic and deleting paragraphs – so at the risk of rambling, I’ll stop here.

From my parents basement,

R.M.

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